


From One Heart Beat To the Next

by pandorabox82



Category: Criminal Minds (US TV)
Genre: F/F
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-11-19
Updated: 2019-11-19
Packaged: 2021-02-13 09:35:12
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 7,575
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21492166
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/pandorabox82/pseuds/pandorabox82
Summary: When Penelope goes into hospital, Alex finds herself coming face to face with the fact that she might lose another of the people she loves, and she doesn't know if she'll be strong enough to handle that.
Relationships: Alex Blake/Penelope Garcia, David Rossi/Erin Strauss
Kudos: 3





	From One Heart Beat To the Next

"I need a one mg of adrenaline drip going, right now!"

Alex wrapped her arms around her body as she was pushed away from the bedside by a nurse trying to comply with the order barked out by the doctor. In the whirlwind of everything that had happened, she hadn't been able to hold on to any names in her brain, instead allowing a free flow of rap lyrics to run over and over as she tried to tell herself that everything would be all right. But this was the furthest thing from all right that she had been since James's accident. And things were rapidly seeming to go from bad to worse. She had picked up a little from James, but the technical details had never seemed to stick, so she felt completely out of her depth in that current moment.

"You shouldn't be here watching this." Alex looked up into the concerned face of another nurse, and frantically shook her head, fresh tears rolling down her face as she looked back at her partner. "There's nothing you can do for her here, and I can clearly see that this is breaking your heart. Would you like me to take you to the prayer room or the family room?"

"No. I wasn't with my husband when he passed because a very well-meaning nurse like yourself told me that I didn't need to be there while the doctors were working on him. I wasn't gone two minutes when he died. I won't be denied being with her now. Do you understand? Or do I need to use smaller words to get it through your thick skull that the only thing that could drag me from her side right now is the largest security officers your hospital currently employs?"

The man flinched at her onslaught of words, and a part of Alex knew that she would regret what she said when she had a clearer mind, but the only thing that she could focus on was the sight of Penelope's body lying so still on the bed, even as all the medical personnel worked on her. She met the nurse's eyes once more, trying to convey some small inkling of the terror that she was currently feeling. He finally seemed to understand just how much she was going through, as he took her hands in his, squeezing softly to hold her attention. "All right, then, how about if I hold your hands until we know more about what's going on? And I'll try to talk you through what's happening."

"Thank you," she whispered, feeling a wave of shame wash over her at his kindness in the face of her unwarranted haranguing. "I'm sorry."

"I've been called worse in less tense situations, actually. And most people have never apologized." She nodded as tears clouded her vision, and she wished that she had had the foresight to call someone to join them there, so that she wasn't going through this alone. And then, through the haze of her sorrow, she heard the welcome beep of the heart monitor, and her head shot up to see a slow, but steady rhythm there. "All right, that's a good sign. The doctor has brought her around with the epinephrine drip. But she still won't be out of the woods just yet."

Alex tried to absorb those words, and the ones that followed, but all she could focus on once more was Penelope's still form and the comforting weight the nurse's hands gave her. "Do, do you think that this is a complication from when she was shot? I know that scar tissue can sometimes do wonky things to bodies."

"We can't know that for certain, ma'am."

"We need to get her to the OR as quickly as possible."

She tightened her grip on the nurse's hands as every nerve in her body froze. "Why?" she whispered.

"I don't know, but the doctor knows what she's doing. Now, you cannot go into the OR with her, and she won't come back to the ER. Would you like me to show you to the family room for the OR?"

"Yes, please," she whispered meekly as she watched the bed that Penelope was laying on be rushed out of the room. "Oh, god, she's not going to die, is she?"

The nurse helped her to her feet, wrapping an arm around her waist as he guided her over to a bank of elevators. Penelope was nowhere to be seen, and that confused her a little. "There's a different elevator system for them to use, so that patients aren't compromised. We're going to take the public one."

She gave him a small nod, allowing him to shepherd her into the next open one. "I can't lose her."

"I know, and that's the hardest thing to get a handle on. Once we're in the family room, I would suggest reaching out to your friends and family. Perhaps there is someone who could come and sit with you while you wait. I'll inform her surgeon that you're here, though, and they'll be out to give you updates on her surgery when they can."

"Thank you," Alex murmured as they rode up. It was easy to fall silent, to try and focus on something other than her overwhelming sorrow. To do that, she read every possible surface, taking not of the posters that were attached to the walls, the information on the LCD screen that told her what was on each floor they passed, and then the doors were opening on the third floor, and she was being led into a cozy family room.

"There's a coffee machine, and any number of restaurants in the area participate in DoorDash or Grubhub. I don't want to stress you out more, but your partner could be in surgery for upwards of eight to nine hours."

Alex nodded absently as she went over to an unoccupied chair and sank down into it, burying her face in her hands. There was no way that she could think about food at a time like this, when she felt like she was going to throw up at a moment' notice. Taking the nurse's advice, she slipped her phone from her pocket and looked at her recent call log. There was only one name that she wanted to talk to in that moment, and she pressed her number, even though she knew that doing so would alert the rest of the BAU as to what was going on. Still, she needed to hear her best friend's voice in her ear, telling her that everything would be all right.

It didn't take Erin long to pick up the phone, and the moment that Alex heard her breath on the other end of the line, she burst into a fresh bout of tears. "Alex? What's wrong, honey?"

"I, I need you to get to the hospital, as soon as possible. I'm waiting for Penny to get out of surgery, and I feel like I'm losing my mind as I wait."

"I'll be right there, honey. Just, hold on to yourself until I arrive. Do you want me to bring you anything?"

"Coffee?"

"Of course. I'll see you in twenty minutes."

Alex nodded silently as Erin disconnected the call. Unable to do anything else, she curled into a tight ball in the chair and hugged her phone close to her chest as she sobbed. There was nothing else she could do, because she wasn't the right type of doctor to make Penelope all better. She didn't know how much time had passed, but the next thing she was consciously aware of was a hand being firmly pressed against her shoulder. Drawing in a shaky breath, she lifted her head and saw Erin and Dave there, and she tried to smile at them, feeling like she was failing miserably.

Erin sank to her knees in front of Alex and then gently pulled her hands away from her chest. "We got here as fast as we could, honey. And we brought food, too. Let's head over to the table, it's always easier to eat on a flat surface." Alex allowed Erin to pull her to her feet, guiding her over to the now free table and helping her to sit there. "Now, what happened? I assumed that you didn't want it to be spread around to the rest of the team just yet, and while I understand your reticence, Dave will probably let everyone know once we know more, if that would be all right."

"That's fine," she gulped out, and Erin nodded before leaning over and hugging her tightly, pressing her lips to her cheek as she gently rocked them back and forth for a few seconds. "I don't know what I'll do, Erin, if I lose another person I love to an early death. I mean, we were so lucky to rescue you from John Curtis, only for me to lose James two years later to a mugging. And now Penny is having heart surgery of some sort, and…" Her voice broke once more, and she turned more fully into Erin, trying to lose herself to the world.

"Shh, Alex. You don't want to make yourself sick," Erin whispered as she rubbed her back, and she nodded as she tried to take a few deep breaths. Finally, she felt like she was in better control of her emotions, and she sat up, accepting the tissues that Dave was holding out to her and using them to dry her face. "All right, here's your coffee, I hope that I remembered your order correctly."

Erin handed her a large cup, and Alex wrapped her fingers around it, allowing the warmth to bleed into her skin as she took a long sip. "This is perfect," she whispered as she watched Dave open the bag of food. The scent of food wafted over to her, and her stomach growled a little. "I guess I am hungry."

"I would be, too, Alex," Dave said as he handed her a box. "We stopped at your favourite take out place, and ordered you your usual."

"Thank you," she said as she opened the box and picked up the sandwich resting there, taking a large bite before drawing one knee up to her chest as she stared at the tabletop. "I never thought that you would see me this emotional. Again."

"Best friends are allowed to see each other at their lowest, Lexie. Now, can you tell me what happened?"

"We were getting ready to head out for the day, and then she said that her heart felt weird. Seconds after she said that, she passed out, dropping to the floor, and I had to call 911. They were at our home so quickly, and we got here quickly, but almost as soon as the doctor was checking her out, her heart stopped, and she needed adrenaline to get it going once more. And then she was going into surgery, and I was escorted here. The nurse said that someone would come by to update me, but I haven't had anyone do that yet."

Erin gave her a small nod as she rubbed her arm once more, then tucked into her food. Dave managed to keep up as light a conversation as possible, and that helped deflect her mind from what was potentially happening to Penelope. They had just finished their meal when the nurse from earlier came into the room, a tight smile on his face. Alex didn't know if that meant he had good new or not, so she reached out for Erin's hand, clasping it tightly as he approached their table.

"I'm so glad that you took my advice and called someone to be here with you as you wait. I thought that you deserved an update before I headed home for the evening." She drew in a long breath as she tried to brace herself for bad news. "Penelope is still in surgery, and the surgeon working on her estimates that she is about halfway through. Everything is going well, and she hopes to be out to talk to you in three hours."

"Thank you," she said, giving him a tremulous smile. "Seriously, thank you for being so kind after my earlier outburst."

"Again, I understand that emotions run high in the emergency room, and you were in a very vulnerable position. I truly hope that you have the best possible outcome, and I'll visit you and Penelope tomorrow, Doctor Blake." She was a little taken aback at the fact that he knew who she was, and she nodded a little as he patted her shoulder before leaving the room.

"He seems nice," Dave commented once they were alone once more, and she gave him a small nod before turning her focus onto Erin.

"Do you want to curl up on the chairs with me?" Erin gave her a nod as they rose to their feet. "And Dave, you can call the others now. I don't want them here just yet, even though I know they'll want to come. I'll just be so overwhelmed by Emily and JJ. And make certain that you call Derek and Hotch, too. I don't know if they'll be able to come, but they should know about what happened."

"Of course, Alex." He stood and went over to her side, pressing his lips against her forehead. "You will be taken care of, I promise. Erin and I will make certain of that."

"Thanks." Tears began to clog her throat once more as she and Erin drifted over to the chairs, and she took up the one nearest the window, staring out at the rapidly descending darkness. Erin sat and rested her head on her arm, the weight comforting to her heart. "I wish that I had seen some sign that would have gotten us here sooner. I feel like I failed her."

"You did everything right. Heart issues sneak up on the best of us. And you know that with her previous gunshot wound, she was bound to have some issue coming up. Aaron after all has had a few issues with relation to what Foyet did to him. I know, that doesn't make you feel good right now, but you need to not beat yourself up over this, because you need to stay strong for Penelope in the weeks and months ahead."

"I don't know if I'll be strong enough to do that. Oh, god, Erin. There's so much to do. Someone is going to have to call my TAs and let them know that I'll be out of the classroom for at least a week, and that they should use the lesson plans in the Dropbox to lead my seminars. And someone needs to let the current Section Chief know that Penelope won't be coming in to work for a little while. Fuck…"

"Breathe, honey, breathe. Hand me your phone, and I'll call everyone that you need to let know what's going on."

She nodded. "If you search TA in my contact list, it will filter them all out, so it will be easier to call them."

"All right." She gave her a small smile as she handed the phone over, watching as Erin's fingers flew over the device before bringing the phone to her ear. Alex checked out of the conversations that she was conducting, since they were all the same, burying her face in her hands as she tried to keep from crying once more. Finally, Erin was handing the phone back to her, and their hands met in the middle. "All I want to do is sleep?"

"I understand, and that is a perfectly valid feeling. Here, lean on me and allow yourself to sleep. I will wake you up as soon as I know more."

"Thank you," she whispered out as she shifted how she was sitting, allowing her head to come to rest on Erin's arm, only to have her lift that arm so that her head was now on her chest before she settled her hand on Alex's shoulder. It didn't take long for her to fall asleep, since she was so exhausted from her earlier crying jags.

Alex woke with a frown, feeling eyes staring at her. Just moments later, Erin was shaking her shoulder, waking her more thoroughly. As her eyes came into focus, she saw that there was an older woman in scrubs kneeling before them, a slight smile on her lips as she looked at them. "I just finished up with Penelope's surgery, and she's been wheeled into recovery. There will still be another two hours before she'll be wheeled to her room, but I am relatively certain that she'll come through this just fine."

"What happened?"

"As near as I can figure, the scar tissue from her previous injury exacerbated something in her pericardium, causing her heart to freak out. I removed as much of that scar tissue as I could, and then repaired the damage to her pericardium, which is why the surgery took so long. If you'd like, I can bring you and your friend down to the room where she'll be staying for the next few days?"

"That would be nice," Alex said as they rose to their feet, her hand groping for Erin's as they followed the doctor down the hall and into a secluded room that was filled with way too many medical devices for Alex's liking. "There's a recliner here?"

"Yes, since I thought that you'd like to spend the night with your partner. We try to accommodate that as often as we can. Your friend will not be able to stay, but she is welcome to wait with you while you wait for Penelope to come here."

"Thank you, Doctor Naylor, for saving my heart's life."

"It's what I do." She gave them a sharp nod before turning in her heel and walking briskly from the room. Once she was gone, Alex slumped heavily in the recliner, rubbing her hand across her face before looking up at Erin.

"I've texted Dave, letting him know Penelope's room number, and I'll be back for visiting hours tomorrow. Don't worry, I won't leave you until Penelope is here, I just want you to know that I will be leaving soon. Okay?"

She sighed as she nodded, reaching her hand out for Erin. Soon, the woman was clasping it gently as she came over by her side. "You know I'm an atheist, Erin. And I know you're not. Please, pray to your God that He will allow my beloved to live. Please."

"Of course, Lexie." Erin lifted their hands to her lips, kissing the back of Alex's softly before taking a seat on the edge of the recliner. "And I know that your beliefs are your own, and I will not try to change them, but I am grateful that you feel comfortable enough to ask that of me. I love you."

"And I love you. You're my best friend again, and I couldn't ask for anyone else that I'd want by my side as we go through this journey together." She looked up and smiled into Erin's eyes, trying to hold in the fresh bout of tears that were threatening to start falling. She didn't want to guilt Erin into staying very much past when Penelope arrived in the room, seeing as how it was already close to midnight. Erin seemed to know how she was feeling, though, as she wrapped her into a tight hug. It was easy to allow herself to be held like that, to forget the world around her as she tried to believe that Penelope would be all right.

Finally, she heard the squeaking of wheels stop outside the room and as she looked up from Erin's chest, Alex watched as the porters brought her beloved into the room. She looked so small and pale in that bed, her clothes gone, replaced with a hospital gown, her makeup removed. "She should sleep for the rest of the night, but she came out of the anesthesia quite well," a nurse said kindly, and Alex nodded dumbly as she watched the nurse hook Penelope up to the monitors after the porters had shifted her partner onto her bed. "Now, I'm afraid that visiting hours are at an end, so your friend will have to leave, but Doctor Naylor said that it was perfectly all right for you to spend the night here in the chair. If you need anything in the morning, just push the call button for a nurse, and we'll see about getting you some basic hygiene products."

"Thank you," she whispered as she watched the nurse leave. "I guess this is your cue to go."

"I don't want to, but I really need to rest, and you need to sleep as well." Erin stood, and Alex copied her, allowing her to wrap her in another tight hug before she left the room. Once she was alone, Alex reached out and picked up Penelope's hand, rubbing her thumb back and forth along the cool skin as she broke down crying once more.

"I will stay by your side until you're out of here, darling. And then until you're better. Because you deserve to have someone look after you, since you look after everyone else so well." She bent down and kissed Penelope's forehead lightly before arranging her hands on her torso and making her way to the recliner. It was difficult to get settled down, since she couldn't stretch out alongside her beloved, but eventually, she was able to calm her mind enough to pass out.

In the morning, she was woken up by the lights turning on, and Alex groaned a little as she blinked her eyes open, a scowl on her face. "Do the lights need to be that bright?" she croaked out before sitting up and rubbing at her face to try and wake up more fully.

"Unfortunately, they only have one setting," the nurse cheerily replied, and Alex fought very hard to keep from biting her head off as she looked down at the blanket that had somehow ended up covering her at some point. It was truly nice to know that the staff were taking care of her alongside Penelope, but she also didn't want to take any focus away from her beloved. "It looks like Penelope is doing a little better this morning. Doctor Naylor will be in at nine to check everything out, and if her vitals remain at this level or better, she'll probably start to wean her off sedation. I know, you probably want to see her look at you, but we need to make certain she's in a good place before we bring her around. The surgery she had was major, and we want to make certain that everything goes well."

Alex nodded as she got to her feet. "Last night, her nurse mentioned something about a toiletry bag for me? I'll be having my friend bring an overnight bag today during visiting hours, but I would really like a toothbrush and paste to get this taste out of my mouth."

"Of course! Give me five minutes, and I'll be right back with that. Do you have any money for breakfast? Unfortunately, we're not allowed to give you the meal that Penelope would have had, if she were awake."

Alex pulled out her phone, hoping that there was still a bit of a charge, since she hadn't plugged it in, and frowned to see that it was dead. "Well, I did have my card on my phone…"

"And I'll bring a charger with me, too."

The nurse smiled as she made a few more notes on the computer before bustling from the room. Alex let out a long breath, still feeling exhausted. But she supposed that would be her new normal for the next few months, maybe even years. Her heart felt so heavy and she went over to Penelope's side, reaching down for her hand and threading their fingers together before squeezing softly. "I want to see you open your eyes soon, darling. But I understand the caution."

She was still holding onto her hand when the nurse returned, handing over the toiletry kit and a charger. "Just return the charger when your friend brings your bag, okay?"

Alex nodded as she tried to find the right words to say. "Thanks. I really appreciate this," she finally ended up saying, her words sounding clunky to her ears, but the nurse just smiled and left them alone. Once the door was closed once more, Alex hunted around for a free plug, and then started charging her phone before slipping into the small bathroom that was in the room, taking a moment to pee before washing her hands. Though she didn't really want to look in the mirror, she knew that she'd have to in order to brush her teeth. She wasn't surprised to find that her hair was a nest of tangles, and she sighed as she looked down at her wrist, letting out a relieved sigh to see that she had a hair tie there. Once her teeth were brushed, she hurriedly tied her hair back before rejoining Penelope.

Her partner was still unconscious, and her heart sank, even though she knew that that was going to be true. Going over to her phone, she saw that there was a small sliver of battery already available, and she turned it on, allowing the notifications to roll in as she unlocked the device and went straight to her text messages. She ignored everything from their well-meaning friends, honing in on Erin's name.

_I've packed up your bag with what I thought you might need, including your tablet and two chargers. Visiting hours start at ten, so I thought I'd drop in around eleven, sit with Penelope for a little while so that you can take a walk around the floor and work off some of that nervous energy that I'm certain you're experiencing. After you get back from your walk, we'll head down to the cafeteria for lunch together. I'll see you soon, and make certain you answer your texts. Everyone wants updates._

Alex shook her head a little, knowing that Erin meant well. "I'll get right on those texts," she muttered, and then scrolled through the messages she had received since Penelope had been admitted to the hospital. Starting with the earliest one received, Alex worked her way to the present, telling all their friends and family what was going on. Her brother had even asked if she needed him to come, and she was sorely tempted to say yes, but ended up asking him to wait until they were home, when she would need more help. Finally, she was finished sending off replies, including to Erin, and then she felt her stomach growl hungrily. "I'll be right back, Penny," she murmured as she unplugged her phone and then kissed her forehead once more, heading out to the nurse's station.

"May I help you?"

"I was brought here last night with my partner, and I didn't really get a clear understanding of the layout, since we went straight from the ER to this floor. Would you tell me where the cafeteria is? I need to get breakfast."

"Certainly." Alex listened intently as the nurse explained where to go, hoping that she remembered the directions as she headed over to the elevator. It didn't take long to reach the ground floor, and she murmured the directions to herself in order to keep them fresh in her mind until she was outside the cafeteria. The scent of food caused her stomach to growl once more, and she shook her head a little as she went inside and quickly ordered something that seemed like it would be easy and quick to make, adding a bottle of orange juice and a large black coffee to the order before paying with her phone and then taking a seat.

She devoured the food, washing it down with the juice before throwing away her trash and then bringing her coffee back up to Penelope's room. The nurse was once more taking obs, and Alex nodded to her as she plugged her phone back in, knowing that it still needed charging. While Penelope slept on, Alex began to do the only thing that she knew would calm her thoughts, opening her Kindle app and starting to read. The hours before Erin was set to arrive passed excruciatingly slow, with her checking on Penelope every few sentences. Finally, the door to the room opened, and she looked up to see Erin entering, a weary smile on her lips.

"You look exactly how I feel, Erin," she said as she stood and went over to her friend's side, wrapping her up in a tight hug. "Thank you for being here for us. I know, the others probably want to see her, too, but I don't want them to see her like this."

"I understand, Lexie, I really do. But thank you for letting everyone know how she was doing this morning. I know, there are going to be times when you don't want to take those few minutes to update everyone, but it will help you focus a little. Or at least, that's what David said helped him when he was waiting for me to get better." Erin let go of her, caressing her face before going over to Penelope's side, picking up her hand and then looking at Alex. "All right, go walk around for a little bit. We'll both be here when you return."

Alex nodded as she unplugged her phone and then took the charger out of the wall before leaving the room. It felt weird to know that she would just be walking around aimlessly, since she desired to be by Penelope's side, doing nothing, waiting for her to be woken up. A watery little laugh escaped her lips as she stared out the window at the skyline, watching the birds fly past. "You've become my sleeping beauty, and my kiss can't even wake you up." Letting out a little sigh, she reached out and pressed her palm against the glass.

Finally, she knew that she couldn't spend another moment away from Penelope, so she turned and made her way back to her room, running into Doctor Naylor as she reached her door. "Good morning," she said, hating the tremor in her voice.

"Good morning, Doctor Blake. I trust that you had a good evening?"

"As best as can be expected in an unfamiliar place. Are you going to ease off the sedation today?"

The doctor tilted her head to one side, and Alex frowned a little, wondering if that meant she would be receiving more bad news. "I haven't had a chance to look over her observations just yet, but I have the distinct feeling that that will certainly be a possibility. Your partner is a strong woman, having survived her earlier shooting. Now, if you'd please head inside?"

Alex nodded as she went in, Erin giving her a soft smile as she rose to her feet and let go of Penelope's hand so that she could wrap an arm around Alex's waist. "I was hoping that you'd come back soon. I'm starting to get a little hungry."

"Oh. I don't know if I want to leave just now…"

"Do, please. I have to conduct a few tests, and it's easier when family isn't in the room," Doctor Naylor replied as she looked up from the computer. "Come back in about three hours, and I'll have an update for you."

"Three hours?" Alex exclaimed, trying to ignore the sharp way Erin dug her fingers into her side as she glared at the doctor.

"Yes. These things take time, and it is my experience that when the family hovers, they get more on edge and I would rather have you a bit relaxed and calm when you come back to hear my findings. Trust me, I wouldn't tell you to do this if I didn't think that Penelope wasn't stable enough to have you be away from her side for that length of time. There's a great café just around the corner from the hospital, and you can bring your tablet and get caught up on messages to your friends and loved ones while you wait. Please, let me do my job to the best of my ability so that I can send your partner home with you as soon as possible."

Alex felt all the tension and fight leave her body as she finally nodded, allowing Erin to tighten her grip on her waist in a more welcoming way. "I know that you're right, I just don't want to leave her side."

"I understand that, but it wouldn't do to make yourself sick with worry as you wait for me. Please, go get some good food, write and call who you need to, and come back ready for the next part of your journey with Penelope."

"All right, thank you," she said as she moved away from Erin to grab her tablet and a charger. "We'll be back in a few hours." Doctor Naylor gave her a small nod before focusing her attention on Penelope, and they left the room with little fanfare. Once they were on the elevator, Erin turned to her and gave her a sad smile. "What?"

"I wish that you didn't rail so hard against what people tell you. Doctor Naylor means well, and I know that she saw the same thing in you that I do. That you want to be the one who storms Heaven's gates and demand that Penelope be made well in a heartbeat. From one heart beat to the next, it doesn't work quite like that." Reaching up, Erin cupped her face and stroked her cheekbone softly. "This isn't going to be like James, I don't know how I know that. There's just this feeling in my heart that even though it will take some time, Penelope is going to pull through this. We just have to have faith."

"I'm trying, Erin. So hard."

"I know." Erin tapped her thumb against Alex's lips before letting out a small sigh and stepping away from her. "Now, I'll cover lunch today, since I don't want you to worry about anything while you're here. David is going to check on your cats and make certain their fed as well as cleaning the litter box, so that's one less worry on your shoulders."

"You guys don't have to…"

"Shush. I couldn't do this when you lost James, since we were so far apart. Please, let me be the friend I should have been back then."

Alex nodded as she stepped closer to Erin once more, letting her head come to rest on her shoulder until they reached the ground floor. It was so easy to allow Erin to clasp her hand as they looked for the café that Doctor Naylor had mentioned, and Alex felt herself relax a little as they walked, the fresh air seeming to fill up some of the cracks in her heart.

By the time they arrived, there was a short line, and Alex let out a little sigh as she pulled out her phone and started to answer the newest set of text messages that had come through since last she had checked. "Derek wants to bring Hank and Haley to come see Penelope. What do you think I should tell him?" she asked without looking up from her phone.

"I would say wait until tomorrow. If Doctor Naylor has good news for us when we return, then maybe he could visit this afternoon, but I think that tomorrow will be better."

"Okay, I'll tell him that. I know, I should know these things, but it's easier to ask and have you answer. Thank you for being my brain for a little while?"

"Lexie, seriously, this is the least I can do. If it were my David lying in that bed, I would be relying on you just as much." She gave Erin a small nod as she tapped out her reply to Derek as they approached the podium. "Table for two, please," she told the hostess, and then they were led to a small table towards the back of the restaurant. Alex wasn't surprised when Erin sat so that she could see the entrance. Old habits died hard, even though they were both out of the Bureau for more than four years.

"I have no idea what to get, Erin. I know I need to eat, but I'm the furthest thing from hungry right now."

Erin looked over the menu before glancing back up at her. "They have macaroni and cheese on here. Though I suppose you're going to ruin it as usual, by eating it with ketchup."

"Just because you're a philistine who doesn't appreciate good food combinations doesn't mean I'm going to give up the way I eat things." Erin laughed lightly, causing Alex to respond in kind, and it felt so good to have a positive emotional release after the events of yesterday. "Oh, it feels so nice to laugh with you."

"And it is so good to hear you laugh." Erin reached across the table and squeezed her hand tenderly. "Now, I just need to decide on what I want." Alex nodded as she rested her chin in her hand, waiting for their server to appear.

"Sorry I didn't get to you right away. Can I start with drinks for you, or are you ready to order?"

"I think that we're ready to order," Erin replied as she picked up her menu once more, quickly rattling off what she wanted before looking pointedly at Alex. She just as quickly ordered before handing her menu to the server, giving her a small smile before turning her focus on her friend. "Now, since we have time to spare, why don't you tell me about this year's Halloween party. Does Penelope have a theme yet?"

Alex nodded before accepting the mug of coffee from their server and sipping at it. "Yes. We've thought that it would be hard to top last year's event, and wanted to scale back a little…"

"Scale back? Our Penelope?"

Alex tapped Erin's hand lightly before arching an eyebrow at her. "We do know how to keep things in moderation at times. And it looks like this was a very good year to decide on scaling back. We're having a séance supper. I'll probably hire a caterer, so that there's less strain on Penelope and myself, and we might have to reel in a few of her more out there ideas, but I really think that we can make this work."

"And I will be more than willing to help you out this year. Just to make things easier on you two." Alex gave her a soft smile before taking another sip of coffee. "So, I assume that we're all going to be wearing turn of the century costumes?"

"That was going to be the suggestion, yes. Or is that too over the top?"

Erin threw her head back as she let out a loud laugh. "You realise that you're talking about your partner, yes? When has she ever been subdued about anything? And that is precisely why we love her." Alex blushed a little as she nodded, and then they settled into a conversation about her recent work in linguistics. Thankfully, it was a good distraction, and by the time their conversation was finished, the three hours had passed, and they were heading back to the hospital, walking arm in arm.

It wasn't until they were up on Penelope's floor that Alex felt her anxiety start to ramp up once more, and Erin seemed to sense the change in her, as she tightened her grip on her arm as she led Alex to the room. Doctor Naylor was speaking lowly to someone, and Alex couldn't make out who was replying, as their voice was too low. Unable to take that as a good sign, she pursed her lips together as she pushed into the room, certain that Penelope would be worse off than when she had left her earlier.

Instead, she found herself looking into those hazel eyes that she had come to love so much in this world, and a happy gasp escaped her lips as she looked to Doctor Naylor before bursting into tears. "Well, that was certainly not the reaction I was expecting," the woman said as Alex turned and gave her a tight hug.

"I, I'm just so overwhelmed with joy," she managed to blurt out as Doctor Naylor gently extricated herself from Alex's embrace. "Thank you so much, Doctor Naylor."

"I was just doing my job," the woman replied as she raised her hands up. "Now, try not to tire your partner out too much, there is still a massive recovery ahead of her. I will return at six to run through what the recovery will look like. I wanted you to have a few hours of happiness together before we go over the difficult details of the future."

Alex nodded before turning her full attention on Penelope, smiling a little as she drank in the sight of Erin and Penelope hugging tightly. Behind her, the door to the room closed softly and she knew that they were alone at last. "Darling, you scared me."

"I scared myself, Alex. Come here." She nodded as she stepped forward, seeing Erin melt into the background of the room as her entire focus narrowed in on Penelope. "I didn't realize that anything was wrong until I blacked out. Doctor Naylor said that I'm lucky."

"You are. You're my lucky Penny." Alex leaned down and kissed her partner tenderly before fumbling for her hand, threading their fingers together as she just stared into her eyes. "Erin's agreed to help out with our Halloween party this year, so we can focus on getting you well before that happens." Penelope nodded, giving her a pained smile, and then Alex was kissing her once more, feeling like she would never be able to get enough of the feeling of Penelope's lips against hers.

"And where is everyone else?"

Alex blushed guiltily as she sank down onto the edge of Penelope's bed, reaching out with her free hand to brush her bangs out of her face. "Derek will be bringing Hank and Haley by tomorrow afternoon, and I'll let the others know that you're awake and that they can come to visit. I just, I couldn't have them all hovering around me as I waited for you to wake up. Erin, well, she knows when to push and when to back off. I'm sorry if that hurts you, Penelope, I just needed you to be awake before the others descended upon us."

"I get it, I really do. I just want to see their faces sooner rather than later. I suppose that I can wait until tomorrow to see them, if it means I get to have you with me. But what about your classes?"

"Erin took care of that for me, and asked my TAs to take over for a few weeks. Thankfully, they've been working closely enough with me for this semester and know what to do to keep the classes moving forward. Because there are not enough horses in this world that could pull me away from you right now." Penelope sighed as she nodded, and then Alex was stretching out alongside her partner, taking care not to disturb any of the tubes and wires that were connected to her partner as she did so. "I love you, my beautiful one. And now, if you'll forgive me, I just want to stare at you and make certain that you stay. Erin and you can keep up a conversation?"

"I wouldn't think that you'd be lost for words, Alex," Erin gently teased, and she shrugged before letting her forehead come to rest against Penelope's. "Ah well, I guess this just means that for once I get to talk more than you or Penelope. What a welcome change!"

"Hey, we're not that bad," Penelope protested, and Alex nodded a little as she made herself more comfortable, knowing that it would be so difficult for her to let Penelope go ever again. "All right, Erin, tell us a naughty story about you and Dave as a way to take my mind off the fact that I'm stuck in this room for probably the next few weeks, if I'm lucky. And I won't be able to get lucky during that time, either," she muttered as she turned her head and kissed Alex softly. "The least you could do is not wear a bra so that I can hold onto you."

"Penelope! Maybe later." Her partner nodded, and Alex felt her heart's burden lighten a little at the small return to normalcy for them. There would be more moments like that in the days to come, and she hoped that she could commit them all to memory for the rough times they were certain to go through.


End file.
